An after-school percussion group playing DJ Shadow's Building Steam with a Grain of Salt and Changeling - pretty near perfectly as far as I can tell. This is fucking awesome! For high school drum geeks a project this has got to be infinitely better than playing Wipeout at the pep rally (right, Dave?).

The Shadow Percussion Project (movie file)

Note: The file is around 65.4 megabytes and plays much better if you save it to your own computer first by right clicking the link and selecting "Save As".

(thx to steveo for the tip)

McSweeney's delivered:

7 Habits of Highly Successful People.

Cooing at new-born babies banned

"A West Yorkshire hospital has banned visitors from cooing at new-born babies over fears their human rights are being breached and to reduce infection."

That is all.

Japanese scientists (AKA "ika otaku") have caught Architeuthis on film!
GO GO GO

Click image for larger version.

The verdict is still out on if this is photoshopped or not; the EXIF data shows it was at least saved in Photoshop most recently. Anybody know the origin of this photo if it's real?

Regarding my previous post about QOOP, the fact that the service rep found the review I wrote and responded in the comments in less than half a day just blew my mind. I imagine that they probably found my post by monitoring a search subscription like this, which, I might add, is a really smart thing to do when a significant portion of your target market is likely to have a blog.

QOOP states publicly in my comments that they are improving their service and willing to make good on the product with which I am less than happy. That's just awesome! Other companies, take note.

I really want this service to work out - if it does, QOOP has gained a loyal customer and free advertising via any future commentary of mine as well as the photo books I will be showing off to everyone I know.

////

The other thing I wanted to mention is that Technorati really got their act together just as Gen Kanai promised in an earlier post here, and as Technorati founder/CEO Dave Sifry posted on his blog. Searches are super fast again, and Cosmos (URL) search is back up. This is great news, because when Technorati was suffering from overload (a product of their own popularity), I searched long and hard for a suitable replacement. There was none.

The photo book I ordered from the QOOP flickr Photo Printer arrived today. I had chosen these photos and a few others from my flickr photostream to publish as a photo book. The short verdict for this service is that the cover and the binding of the book are nice, but the inner pages and print quality could be greatly improved.

The stock used for the inner pages is just too thin, and photos are visible through the opposite side. That's all there is to say about that.

The print quality on the cover is decent because the cover is thick and glossy, like traditional photo paper, but the quality of the printing on the inner pages leaves a lot to be desired - I can get much better results even when printing on copier paper with my HP inkjet printer at home. For this photo service to be viable, this issue must be addressed before anything else. The color correction is horrible and all the photos are lackluster and almost look like they are printed at screen resolution in some cases.

I realize this service is in beta, but print quality of the photographs should really be their first priority. It's a shame, because easy printing from flickr is a great idea and the web interface for the designing/ordering system was impressive. If they improved print quality of the final product, I would probably use them again, but not until then.

UPDATE: Check out the message that QOOP left in this post. I must say, this is very impressive. I believe I will give them another try when they switch over to the glossier stock, because the company is obviously trying hard to please its customers. I respect that.

Hahahahahahahahaha!!! It can fly!

Your IQ Is 135

Your Logical Intelligence is Below Average Your Verbal Intelligence is Genius Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius Your General Knowledge is Exceptional

It's pretty obvious this test is flawed because I'm a dumbass at math. I'm just stoked because this test proves that my logic is fuxx0rd - hey, if Jody didn't go to jail, maybe it's because SHE'S A DIRTY WHORE WHO SUCKED OFFICER WAGNER'S LE COQ SPORTIF, if ya know what I'm sayin'.

Anyway, here's a guy literally scored off the charts and analyzes several flaws in the test: LINKY LINKY

This is one of my favorite JP flash files. I searched around for it a while but but the Geocities page it was originally hosted on is no more. I'm mirroring it here:

DORAEMON/OFFSPRING

That Ipecac video reminded me of one of the all-time Vomitus Classicos:
"We're gonna take a commercial break..."

Couple of interesting ones at Big boys:

IPECAC - This one reminded me of the Chinese food/heatstroke incident I had last month and left me kinda queasy.

FREUDIAN SLIP - Heh.

I realize that I've been remiss in posting video links lately. Lets fix that right now, starting with: He Man does 4-non-blondes

To roughly quote Jedi Mind Trick, it's like "hating necrophiliacs for fucking the dead." When you go read the touching story on the following link, don't forget to see all the comments:

Grief - Barn Swallows

It's always sad when the tree-hugging animal lovers expose themselves as the least knowledgable about nature.

My family's Shitzu, Jak, is now officially famous.

Dave has pointed out that I'm not ranked top for a Google Blog Search on my name.

I'm willing to bet this post puts me on top.

- Justin Yoshida

Unbelievably riveting fruit trivia: Can This Fruit Be Saved?

First of all, and most importantly, I have come to understand that a wedding is for the bride.

Period.

Now, I had heard this sentiment before, but didn't put much stock in it because, hey, I'm psyched about our wedding, too. The thing is though, like most guys, I'm psyched about a lot of things - trying a new beer, having a good feed, sleeping in on the weekends. I look forward to all of these things and profoundly enjoy every new experience. I'm psyched that I found a used lens for my camera. I'm psyched that I've put my car through its last car inspection and I can now theoretically cut the top off and remove the muffler with impunity. I'm especially psyched that I will be living in a new country next year, learning a new language among friendly people. However.

Observing Nam making plans for the wedding has made me realize that I am a total lightweight, a absolute noobie in Everygirl's Land of Being Psyched. Let me explain.

When I go home from work every day, my living room floor is totally covered with magazines and brochures with names like, "Bride to Be," "Perfect Wedding," and, "101 Guest Gift Ideas." They are splayed out so I can see the writing in the margins and pages marked with Post Its that she wants me to read. Yeah, right. When I fail to comply with her wishes, she takes all of my reading materials out of the bathroom (Aaron Cometbus, Kevin Kim, and car/fishing/computer mags), hides them upstairs, and substitutes them with bridal magazines! Many a potentially pleasurable crapping experience has been ruined by this heresy, I tell you (Vibration lures are hot! Wedding veils are not!).

We sit down and have dinner. Topics of conversation include what we will serve at the wedding party and... well that's pretty much it. I am a chowhound, not a food snob, and I excel at:
1. Making good food, and
2. Eating good food,
but I pretty much suck about planning what we will be eating on a planned date half a year from now. It is fun to try to keep up with Nam for the first ten minutes or so, but I'm cursed with a short attention span when it comes to this stuff.

For instance, the other day we went shopping with nothing specific in mind, I just wanted to make her happy by taking her where she wanted to go, and she just wanted to look for "ideas or stuff she could use for the wedding." Guys, between you and me, by the end of the day I just wanted a quiet place to shoot myself. Girls, I know that sounds horrible and selfish, and it probably is, but I'm just not wired that way. Don't get me wrong, I love my wife and will get her anything she wants (I will even buy her the things she at first says she wants then changes her mind about and says "save your money" about but I know she still secretly wants but feels genuinely guilty about, not fake-guilty like a master-of-puppets), and I am very much psyched about being married and our upcoming wedding, it's just that I AM NOT A GIRL.

And by default, compared to Nam, I am less psyched about, say, the type and color of flowers to be used for table settings. I want something pretty and classy and fresh, but other than that I really don't care if it's lilies or roses or even Birds of Paradise. But for girls, this is different. Apparently due to some estrogenous primal instinct, it is natural for them to raise the level of planning and meticulousness to one normally reserved (in a guy's mind) for say, an amphibious assault on European beaches against numerically superior and better-armed adversaries. Even after professing to be sick of it all, she will browse for hours online looking for the One True Tablecloth Pattern. Me, I just want them to be white linen (OK, maybe I secretly want 3 per table, but still...).

/////////

In the end, this is going to be such a cool wedding party. Nam will love it, I just know it. I just hope everybody knows how much I will never want to see a bridal magazine, ever again.

Now if this isn't a contender for best T-shirt Engrish, I don't know what is.

This is the coolest application for Google Maps EVER! Use it to see where you would come out if you dug a hole to the other side of the Earth: Go forth and dig!

Tip: There is a bug with the zoom that brings up Australia as the default result every time. In order to resolve this, once you have chosen where to dig and the results come up, zoom all the way out and see the note that says "your hole ends up here!"

Well, the Danjiri lived up to its reputation and was, in a word, exhilarating. In my free time, I'm looking through the hundreds of photos I took and will post the best ones here. I might have gotten five really killer pics, only half of what I set out for, but more than I expected. The main difference between my new D50 and the digital cameras I have used in the past is simply that I like a lot more of my own photos than I used to - and that's a remarkable thing, really.

While I'm getting my best ten or so photos ready to publish on this blog, you can get a sneak peek of about 200 or so I posted in my Flickr photostream:
Kishiwada Danjiri Matsuri 2005

Tomorrow morning, Nam and I will ride the hydrofoil from Sumoto to Kansai Airport. From there we will ride the train a couple stops and step into the semi-controlled chaos of the Danjiri Matsuri. This is one of the few things I promised myself that I would do before leaving Japan (some of the other things include watching someone disembowel themself with a short, sharp sword, and just once not being told "but you look Japanese" after introducing myself as American).

I am taking a cumulative 2.5 GB storage space in memory cards, as well as my trusty micronote to transfer data to should this be insufficient.

I want to take at least ten really killer photos. That's a lot, I know, but I will set my sights high since the weather should be nice and since I am, after all, ditching work to drink beers and watch gigantic wooden floats collide together in unrehearsed and seriously dangerous ways.

Wish me luck!

My dad's Shitzu, Jak. He is SO getting submitted to that Bee Dogs site.

Here's a list I never expect Japan to make: List of places with fewer than ten people

Go and read a heartwarming story about the Katrina relief efforts: Herc Driver's Report on Katrina Rescue Ops

Taro, you need this.

Neal Stephenson fans, start your engines: Acoustic Snooping on Typed Information

I don't know what's more disturbing, the fact that this site exists, or the fact that my family's Shitzu has a bee costume, too. Or the fact that I bought him an Eeyore costume at a dog clothing store in Kobe last year. Oh my god, I'm practically an eight year old girl! I've been in the land of Hello Kitty and Totoro way too long!

(Mom, please send a photo of Jak in his bee suit for me to post)

(via)

In a brave struggle to become less irrelevant and direct attention away from the fact that they lost the Desktop Publishing Wars a long time ago, Quark Inc. has adopted a new logo.

Oh wait, did I say "new?" Let the games begin:

The new Quark logo resembles the Scottish Arts Council's logo.

But wait! The new Quark logo also resembles the Designer's Network Logo.

Who will sue first? To find out, tune into next week's show of When WingDings Attack!

UPDATE:

Look familiar?: Artworkers

ANOTHER UPDATE:

Quark has responded; issue is not yet resolved.

Summary: Koizumi is the FUCKING MAN! ALL HAIL KOIZUMI! BANZAI!!! BANZAI!!!

It must be nice winning an election and watching the stock market rise like this. Plus, let's face it, the Richard Gere look-alike thing was a fucking masterstroke. Interesting fact: Did you know that before the plastic surgery, Koizumi was a dead ringer for Pat Morita?

Daniel-san, you must concentrate!

Unfortunately, Japanese politics are a prime example of "the more things change the more they stay the same." For instance: Post office privatization. If you're waiting to see how this is going to directly affect your life in Japan, tell me how it turns out a couple decades from now, okay? Seriously... People who are predicting the change in interest rates for savings accounts at this point in time ARE FUCKING DELUSIONAL OR HAVE A SERIOUSLY KICK-ASS CRYSTAL BALL +7 CHARISMA. Okay?

(Note from Editor: Compulsory "Japanese erection" joke deleted.)

Chilling out on the farm, a photoset on my Flickr page.

AHA! A possible explanation for my recent Indian chief dream (see my mom's comment at the bottom). I completely forgot about that! Actually, catching that sheepshead won us the "fishing tournament." I remember being extremely proud about the fact that we used small rock crabs that I smashed with my dad's "abalone prybar" (a flat piece of iron with rubber grip I think may still be rusting in our garage or the backyard shed) to catch that fish. The funny thing is, before we landed that one, something big hit our bait and nearly jerked me off the rocks we were fishing from as I held onto the surfcasting rod for dear life! I will always wonder about that first big "one that got away."

Yeah, the YMCA Indian Guides trip to Catalina... Awesome. As I sit here and reminisce, more memories from that trip are coming back to me... I remember the brown and yellow dome tent we slept in, the first tent we ever owned with sectioned (but not joined with elastic cord as has become the norm) fiberglass tent poles; you had to be careful because they would leave invisible fiberglass splinters in your hands if you weren't careful that would itch and be sore for days... One of the other fathers brought Kansas City strips to barbeque on the propane grill for all the other dads. My dad told me it was ironic that some of the other dads thought it fit to bring whiskey to drink around the campfire at an Indian outing, a reference I wouldn't understand for a few more years... That propane tank bust a seal the next morning when someone hooked it up, and it made a loud screeching noise for a good minute or so. I remember taking cover behind a steel trash can, sure it would explode.

Of course, in this politically fucking retarded age of college sports teams having to be renamed, etc., I am quite sure the Indian Guides are no more. Probably renamed to "Gaia's Earth-Friendly Vegetarian Recyclable Co-op of Homogenous World Heritage," or some such bullshit. Lemme google this shit to make sure - yep. The YMCA Indian Guides are no more. What a damn shame.

And in a way, what irony! The Indian Guides made Indians cool to all the kids who participated in the programs! These days, the word "Indian reservation" evokes only one thing: Casinos. This makes me very sad. In fact, I'm so far behind the times, I don't really know if the term "Indian reservation" is racist or not! I certainly hope not.

The first time I tried to catch him, he jumped out of the tupperware and onto my hand. Talk about goosebumps... I nearly shit my pants. Nam yelled at me not to kill it - kill it? HOW? Besides, woman, you're standing on a chair after I flicked it on the floor!

After I finally captured the Mighty Awaji Bird Eating Spider, we took a walk down the street and released him in the bushes next to Jusco.

If you look closer (open a larger photo by clicking on it), you can see he's missing a leg. He might be the same one Adam photographed on the front porch last month.

I've uploaded more pictures of this beast here.

Attention all Americans in Japan, whipped cream in cans is NOW AVAILABLE AT A JUSCO SHOPPING CENTER NEAR YOU!!!

Fear not the Euro-sounding Chantibic brand name, this stuff looks, smells, and lubricates just like Redi Whip! (or so I'm told)

Get your hands on a can NOW, while supplies last - I fear the Japanese palate will reject the simple flavor of pure canned whipped cream and the manufacturers will soon be forced to churn out localized blends:

- Nama Ume flavor! (Great on hamo sushi!)

- Wonderful Wasabi! (Perfect with chu-toro!)

- Dashi (Just spray on a hot bowl of rice for an instant meal!)

- and of course, the old Japanese standby, American Corn! (For hot dogs and hamburgs!)

What the hell? (see comments at bottom of that page) May as well have some fun with it, I guess.

Speaking of cars, the new voice-controlled car navigation systems are a total fucking trip. A couple weeks ago, I caught a ride with a guy from work to an after-work enkai (drink up) in his new navi-equipped ride. I truly felt like a stranger, because he carried on a conversation with the in-dash navigation system, which he has dubbed Keiko, the whole way.

DRIVER (using destination input command): Keiko! Destination, Taiho (restaurant name), Route 28.

KEIKO (in sexy woman's voice): Confirmed. Time to destination is approximately five minutes.

DRIVER: Keiko! Thank you.

KEIKO: You're welcome.

Now this was pretty fucking geeky and I teased the fuck out of my coworker, asking him where he stuck his dick to receive a "lube job", etc., but the best was yet to come:

KEIKO (as we approached town): Take the next right. By the way, do you like ice cream?

ME: WTF!!?!

DRIVER: Keiko! No.

KEIKO: Oh, okay then.

ME: What the fuck was that about?

DRIVER: She wanted to make us stop by the Baskin Robbins at Jusco.

ME: Doesn't she know it closes at 10? Dumb bitch.

DRIVER: Shut up! You will respect Keiko, or you will walk!

/////////

I fucking love technology, but it's a curse I tell you. It's eventually going to come to a point where humans no longer need each other, but by that time I hope to be long gone. My laptop is indispensable, but I draw the line at robot fellacio (in Japanese: robofela).

Annoying beeps and auto-braking are quite possibly the most unwanted features I can think of, for a car. And yet: Toyota Computer Makes You Watch the Road

What we really, really need is a Remote Bitchslap Feature. That guy weaving across three lanes? RBF. The secretary type who can't stop glancing at her PDF/keitai every two seconds? RBF. That ugly guy with index finger probing for salty green nostrilnuggets? RBmothafuckinF.

Warning: I will most likely be automatically RBFing every white Toyota that passes, just on principle.

(link via)

It's not easy being a leading authority in the English-language realm of Japanese Fish Sausage, and yet, I feel I have accomplished something very important.

For my next project I had hoped to cover the plastic food replicas often seen in the front window of Japanese restaurants (and on sale in Doguyasuji), but someone has already done an excellent job of that: Delicious Vinyl: Japan's Plastic Food Replicas

I dreamt of speaking with an Indian chief over a campfire. Unfortunately, it was not an Indian fire, but a "white man's fire," and it drew our enemies in closer and closer with its absurd largeness. They were taking potshots at us. Hurriedly, the chief passed onto me a buffalo horn and said simply, "you will know what to do with it."

Then he started singing:

Hayayayayigh
See my arrows fly
Hayayayayigh

Over and over and over. An arrow pierced his heart, and he passed into the next world, content. I was left holding the buffalo horn.

//

The thing is, I know this song from my childhood, but I can't remember what it's from. Why so many vivid dreams lately? (That's not a complaint, I just want to know why.)

Why does this guy want to make his BMW look like a civic???

Why???

Is this shit really happening?

(via)

Goddamn fucking sicko.

It really wouldn't surprise me if this guy was a spammer.

Poor little guinea pig.

HOLY SHIT.

My prayers go out to all.

Some asshole spammer is spamming blogs with a link from my blog (details here). He's spamming my readers/commenters, it seems. I apologize for this. I have nothing to do with the spam being sent. But I still feel very bad about the people getting spammed.

On the brighter side of things, SPAM spelled backwards is still MAPS.

Now that I have your full attention, may I introduce: THE TOP 10 MOST RIDICULOUS BLACK METAL PICS OF ALL TIME (note: not safe for work, or anywhere else, really)

And speaking of blasts from the past, I downloaded three classics from my wasted youth last night: Willow, The Princess Bride, and The Beastmaster. Together with my Hawk the Slayer DVD, I now possess the keys to Greyskull! Gandaaaalf!

Is it just me, or is Technorati hosed about 80% of the time? Anyway, I found a new blog search tool that's proving fairly useful: Clusty the Clustering Engine

Yes, I know "Clusty" sounds more like a dingleberry-infested pair of undershorts than a search site, but they're simply running out of clever names for these things, OK?

Go generate your very own bullshit job title for your business cards: LINK