Today I wasn't allowed to correct the phrase, "for you apploval," on an official letter because it was "written by someone on the board of directors." The guy who told me this rolled his eyes as he said it, too. I almost snapped him in two like a pencil, but thought better of it. Instead, I asked the ficus in the break room why the hell they even bother running this crap by me if they won't let me make corrections.

The ficus thought about it for awhile, then came up with a fairly satisfying answer: Apparently, demi-gods are allowed to make up their own grammar. Duh! Stupid me...

Because today did not start off so well (I almost got in TWO accidents on the way to work, where I was promptly chastised for not buttoning down the button-down collars on my new pink shirt - how could I make something like that up?), I was happy to read my mom's commentary on the party they had at home. Apparently, we in the Land of the Big Red Rising Riceball missed out on:

- Hot Dogs

- Barbecued Kalbi

- Silver Queen corn

- Homegrown zucchini, eggplant, Maui onions, and bell peppers

- My Auntie Betty's potato salad, fresh-baked cookies, and a "crusty, crunchy coffee toffee cake"

- 20 pounds of King crab legs

- Case of oysters

- Lumpia

- Auntie Ling's steamed ginger/scallion flounder and deep-fried flounder

...and to top it all off, S'mores.

The thing that really gets me though, is that they were able to make S'mores in our fireplace. Living in Japan for so long, I basically forgot those things existed.

Awash in pink sea,

Workers in new uniform,

Banzai off a cliff.

//

Explanation: Today the Nihon Keizai Shimbun leaked that my company is laying off 10,000 employees! Can't help but wonder how many could have been saved, say by not changing the uniforms for the entire workforce. And I'm sure that the 10,000 that get the axe will be thrilled to have learned their fate from a newspaper!