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English Engrish

I saw this and I pictured James Bond looking at the Man with the Golden Gun as he says "Bond, I'm gonna bust a cap in yo' ass, Cracka! Any last words?", with the Golden Barrel pointed steadily in the middle of Bond's head. Bond chews on some grape flavored Bubblicious, blows a huge bubble, pops it, and repeats. The Man, in an uncharacteristic display of emotion, shows his anger and disgust by hastily cocking the Golden Hammer. With a smile on his face, Bond spits the gum out into his thumb and forefinger, and sticks the purple wad into the glinting barrel. The man is so completely and utterly shocked that he merely stares while this is happening, with his jaw dropped in disbelief that the Golden Gun could be violated in such a casual and sacreligious manner.

As you can see, these words on a simple can of "gum" put a really bizarre picture into my head, and it its not even a Japanese product. Holt's is a British company. Ah, those crazy Brits! To us Americans, "Lorry" is a girl's name , a boot is something that a cowboy wears instead of a shoe, and "I'm dying to smoke a fag!" has an entirely different meaning. Also, for the record, a windshield is the window that shields the occupants of a vehicle from the wind. If it was a real windscreen (a screen, such as is used to keep insects from passing through an open window), it would allow the wind and rain and anything small enough to pass through the small holes to smack everyone in the face. While this screen would filter out most insects, the momentum of their impact would pulverize and scatter their dismembered body parts all over everyone.

So back to the picture at the top; what is this product from the U.K.?

The Answer.
Hint: it is not what James Bond uses to patch up the silencer on his Walther P.P.K. after he uses it to deflect a laser beam.

Comments (5)


Um, I'll try guessing. Is it a muffler repair product...or something related to auto repair??



Scuba Steve:

You Patronize Bond, yet you blasphemize the Brits. You bloody twat! BTW you need to look up the definition of a screen, while you're at it you may venture into the meaning of "twat" as well. You don't need to look it up in Webster's "English" Dictionary or Oxford's either for that matter. A screen is not necessarily a filter (although, certain misguided and unsupervised misadventures may prelude to such). As posted by dictionary.com: A movable device, especially a framed construction such as a room divider or a decorative panel, designed to divide, conceal, or protect. Why do you always make me defend my heritage? I would attack the Japanese back, but then I would only be making fun of half of myself. "Data always make fun of. Your inventions never work. Hah!"

Scuba Steve:

"Hey Guys. Fifty dolla bill! Fifty dolla bill!"


Heh, its funny that you think that I'm making fun of you. Believe me, I get railed on by the Brits, the Canadians, and the other assorted mix of gaijin over here as well as the Japanese.

Although, I got kind of pissed on Saturday. A Japanese guy asked me if I was French, and all I could manage was "No".

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